Chicken in the Yard!

Poo poo emergency!

As a parent you learn to ask your kid early and often if they have to go to the potty. You ask as they wake up in the morning, before you leave the house, at restaurants, grocery stores, museums, parks, right before they go to bed, and just about every other time of the day. You soon learn that the answer is always the same: "No." Though it's delivered in more of a: "No! Get out of my face about it, sheesh!" manner.

So today as we were strolling around Trader Joe's I didn't even bother asking whether she had to go or not. And it was about when I got the bananas in the basket that I heard the panicked cry: "I have to go potty!" Which in kid terms means "I know you ask me all the time and I say no but now I've waited too long and if you don't get me to a potty immediately you're gonna be buying me some new undies, pants, and mostly likely socks and shoes." So, being a seasoned parent, I kept my calm and steered us in the direction of the bathrooms. That's when the chant began.

"Poo poo emergency! - Poo poo emergency! - Poo poo emergency! - Poo poo emergency! - Poo poo emergency!"

I turn to locate the source of the alarm only to see my daughter following slowly behind me, stop, face one direction and shout her announcement. Then she'd take a few more steps, stop, turn the other direction and shout her announcement again. This continued until we finally reached the stockroom where the bathrooms were located.

Thankfully we made it and all was well. Though I'm not too sure Trader Joe's appreciated a little kid yelling "Poo poo emergency!" while heading into the stock room. That can't be good for business.

How have I gone all week without a post?

I know I don't keep a full-time job, other than raising my daughter of course, but I'm finding it difficult to keep regular updates lately. It's probably due to spreading myself a bit too thin, especially since I added Twitter, and now even Facebook to the mix. I know those only require one sentence updates but it's hard to keep each one going simultaneously. So what ends up happening is that I'll take the easy road and just update Twitter and Facebook since it requires little to no time compared to longer blog entries. But I enjoy updating the blog more so I need to refocus a bit back onto Chicken in the Yard so that you, my dear reader, aren't left with almost an entire week with no new posts.

That being said, I don't really have much to report other than Belle pee'd on the couch yesterday. Not a shining moment, but she knew it wasn't good. Honestly, it's all on us because we really need to make sure that she goes regularly and this time we didn't set the "pee-pee timer" as usual. Pretty soon she'll be fully potty trained, we just need to hang in there and help her along. It will be a glorious day when we no longer have to worry about her accidentally peeing on stuff. Of course once that's done then it's time to phase out ther pacifier... an entirely new struggle, but we'll deal with that later.

"Daddy, I'm squeezing my cheeks!"

Belle has many ways to indicate to me that she needs to get to a potty - FAST! Her latest one being: "Daddy, I'm squeezing my cheeks!" This developed after I saw her playing with her toys once while standing in a very tense and awkward position. I then asked her if she was in fact squeezing her cheeks because she had to pee and she told me that she was. So Belle now uses that phrase to let me know it's time to go. This now joins her other two favorite phrases that include the less amusing: "Daddy, I have to go pee-pee!" and the most accurate: "Daddy, I'm doing the pee-pee dance!" That last one actually comes with a dance and you best get the performer to a potty before the music stops or else the dance will end with splashes.

I know I've written about a few potty accidents we've had, but thankfully we've only had a few. Overall this kid is kicking butt in the potty training world. There was a week there where she had 3 accidents, including one during a nap, but other than that I can probably count them all on one hand. Not bad for a 2 1/2 year old. She goes #1 and #2 in the potty, doesn't need to wear a pull-up for naps, and sometimes she'll make it through the night without wetting her nighttime pull-up. I think we are getting closer to a fully potty trained little person. Plus she's saving us money on diapers! And with this economy, that rules!

Of course when Belle is 13 and asks if I ever posted a picture of her sitting on the toilet for the world to see I won't be able to say: "No honey, of course not." But it will have been her own fault for being so darn cute. My little Potty Princess.

I really need to master the Jedi Mind Trick

So Belle and I were in Target and she had to pee. Do I really need to tell you the rest? Ok, I will. We were walking in one of the toy aisles and I let Belle get out of the cart so she could play with stuff. Things were going well for a couple of minutes, but then:

Belle: "Daddy, I have to go potty!"

Me: "DO NOT go pee-pee in your pants."

I look down to see wet trails down her jeans.

Me: "Belle, STOP peeing and we'll go to the bathroom."

The wet trails continued down both legs, to her shoes, into a pool around her feet. She then stopped, most likely because she was done.

Me: "These aren't the droids you're looking for... aw hell."

I spoke too soon

It's day two and Belle just pee'd through her undies, pants, and on her Dora chair. My first cleaning task not only involves washing her clothes but also learning the fine art of pee removal from cushions. This parenthood thing rules.

Belle's diaperless day

Today, Belle wore no diaper. That's it. That pretty much sums up the day. Sure other stuff went on but it's not important. The only thing you need to know is the fact that my daughter's little buns were cradled not by super absorbent mesh and plastic, but soft 100% cotton princess undies. Let that soak in awhile...

Yeah, crazy huh? Also kind of funny how I used "soak" in that last paragraph since I'm talking about peeing and diapers and undies... Anyways, now that we have the facts straight let's move onto the most important aspect of this news. How did she do?

She rocked it! I didn't have to handle one piece of pee soaked clothing all day. It couldn't have been any better. I knew this was coming soon since she's been going to the potty regularly lately and I just needed to put in that extra effort to make the diapers go away. Of course knowing that she wasn't wearing a diaper today meant I was super motivated to take her to the potty more often. So much so that I introduced Belle to the "Pee Pee Timer." You may not realize that your house has one of these but it does. It's often confused with the "Oven Timer" but don't be fooled. All you do is set it for 20 minutes and then "when you hear the beeps, it's time for peeps!" Belle loved it and would yell "THE BEEPS! TIME FOR PEEPS!" After an hour or two of this I realized that 20 minutes was way too frequent, so it moved to 30, and then to a full hour after each time she went pee.

The day was going so smoothly that I even risked a venture outside of the house. Oh yes, I unleashed my diaperless daughter to the world so that all may witness her superior bladder control. Sure I reminded her every two minutes that she was wearing undies and needed to tell me if she needed to go potty, but it worked! She left the house dry and returned home dry. Plus I got some errands done - woohoo!

She still has to wear diapers when taking naps and going to bed at night but that's to be expected. It'll take awhile for her to harness the power of unconscious bladder mastery. Until then during her waking hours she will enjoy the freedom from plastic, the comfort of cotton, and the slightly loose pants since the bulky diaper is no longer on her frame. Do I expect tomorrow to go as well? Yes. Do I expect to be pee'd upon in the future? No doubt. Will it be gross? Absolutely.